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After sad passing, looking to life of happiness

Irish Language / By Elaine Ní Bhraonáin

This is the first time I have written in almost a year. The reason being that I needed to focus on getting my PhD finished once and for all. Thankfully it’s almost done.

Many things, both good and bad, happened to me over the past year. I lost my Nana Rose on June 17 last year. She was almost 105 years of age and was quite a unique woman. We were very close and I can see strong traits of her in me. I was absolutely heart broken when we lost her but she had a dignified quiet death, in her own home, surrounded by her family. She was a remarkable woman, whom I wrote about often. It came as no surprise when we found out that she had requested that her body be donated to scientific research. She spent her whole life dedicated to medicine and health. She was a nurse and midwife, qualifying in the early 1930s. Even in death, she wished to help people by giving her body to a University for medical research. Following her wish, we get to bury her in a year’s time. Her death has left a legacy behind, she had seven children and 25 grandchildren and we are all very close, something that pleased her greatly. I sense her in so many things I do, decisions I make and feelings I have. We had a great relationship, strong love for one another and we were great friends. I understand that she had such a long and healthy life but I miss her dearly.

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Three months later, September 2012, something major happened to me. My boyfriend Dean asked me to marry him. He is everything to me. We have been through so much since we first met that I was the happiest girl in the world when this happened. We met back a few years back and started off having a long distance relationship which we all know isn’t an easy thing. We broke up then got back together a while later but decided we needed to be together fulltime. Everything was going really well for us then Dean was hit by cancer in May 2011. Our lives changed drastically, we spent so much of our time in and out of hospitals. Dean had an operation, then month after month of chemotherapy and radiotherapy. He bore the illness with such strength and tried so hard to have the courage to keep fighting. He was so weak and ill at the end of all his treatment but still remained headstrong and promised me that he would do all he could to win the battle over this horrific, painful, cruel disease. That was 18 months ago,that he finished his chemo, and I am happy to say that my fiancé Dean is free from cancer since. We go to the doctor every three months where Dean is prodded and poked and faces lots of test and scans to see whether or not the cancer is back. Those visits are sheer torture, we sit and wait to be told the results. Hopefully Dean will continue to get good clear results and we can finish planning our wedding together. I can’t wait to marry Dean next year. My Nana of course won’t be with us but I think of her often and how she had a very long and happy life. May you rest in peace Nana. To my dear Dean, I love you more than I thought possible. With you, I am a better person. Thank you for everything. xx

Is é seo an chéad uair agam scríobh le bliain anuas. An fáth ná go raibh brise uaim chun deireadh a chur leis an Ph D, faoi dheireadh thiar thall, táim beagnach críochnaithe. Tharla neart rudaí dom ó bhíos i dteagmháil libh, droch rudaí agus rudaí maithe. An dá príomh rud ná gur cailleadh mo Mhamó Rose ar an 17 Meitheamh an bhliain seo caite. Bhí sí beagnach 105 bliana d’aois. Ba bhean faoi leith í agus bhí gaol iontach eadrainn. Tá treithe ionam a thagann díreach ó mo Mhamó. Bhíos croí bhriste nuair a cailleadh í ach bhí a muintir thart uirthi agus í i mbéal an bhás, fós ina cónaí ina teach féin. Bhí bás ciúin, socair aici, lán de dhínit. Mar a duireas, ba bhean as an gnáth í, bean ar scríobh mé fuithi go minic. Níor chuir sé ionadh ar bith orainn nuair a thugamar le fios go raibh sí tar éis a corp a bhronnadh do thaighde leighis. Chaith sí a saol mar bhanaltra agus bean cabhartha agus fiú agus í imithe ar shlí na fírinne, bhí sí fós tugtha den leigheas agus ag iarraidh cabhrú le daoine. Tugadh a corp d’Ollscoil agus beidh muid in ann í a chuir i gceann bliana. D’fhág sí oidhreacht ina diaidh, bhí seachtar páiste aici agus 25 gar-pháiste agus táimid ar fad an-mhór lena chéile, rud a raibh sí an-sásta faoi. Aithním í i neart rudaí a dhéanaim agus conas mar a mhothaím. Bhí cairdeas agus grá an-mhór eadrainn agus tuigim go maith go raibh saol chomh fada sin aici agus gur bhain sí sult as an saol ach airím uaim go fóill í.

Trí mí ina dhiaidh sin, tharla eachtra mhór dom. Chuir mo bhuachaill Dean ceist orm é a phósadh. Is bun agus barr mo saol é. Is iontach an rud é chun tarlúint dúinn mar is casta an bóthar a raibh muid air ó bhuaileamar lena chéile. Ba ghaol fadthurais a bhí againn don chéad cúpla bliain ach shocramar ar caoi a mbeadh muid in ann bheith lena chéile. Ansin tharla tubaiste millteanach dúinn, buaileadh Dean l’ailse. Bhí gach rud ag dul ar aghaidh go breá ansin go tobann, d’athraigh ár saol agus chuaigh muid i dtaithí ar neart ama a chaitheamh san ospidéal. Bhí obráid ag Dean, ansin mí i ndiaidh mí, lán de cheimiteiripe agus raidióteiripe. Ba laoch é Dean tríd an rud ar fad, bhí sé dearfach agus rinne sé iarracht bheith lán de mhisneach, chomh fada agus ab fhéidir leis. Bhí sé chomh lag agus tinn i ndiaidh an cúram ar fad ach fós ceanndána agus chomh dílis nuair a d’admhaigh sé dhom go raibh sé chun a mhíle dhícheall a dhéanamh an bua a fháil ar an ngalar scanrúil seo. Chríochnaigh sé a chemo ocht mhí dhéag ó shin agus tá áthas an domhain orm a rá go bhfuil sé go hiomlán saor ó ailse, buíochas le Dia. Téann muid chuig an dochtúir gach trí mhí, áit a mbíonn go leor scruduithe ag Dean bhocht chun aimsiú amach bhfuil an diabhal ailse thar n-ais. Le cúnamh Dé, leanfaidh sláinte mhaith Dean ar aghaidh go fada an lá. Táim chomh sásta bheith mar fiancée ag Dean agus ag tnúth go mór le é a phósadh an bhliain seo chugainn. Sea, ní bheidh mo Mhamó linn an lá sin ach brathaim í ionaim gach lá de mo shaol. Ar dheis Dé go raibh d’anam dílis Nana agus Dean, tá grá agam duit, grá níos láidre gach aon lá de mo shaol. Go raibh maith agat as ucht gach rud a chroí. xx